Growing up, I have always been the sort of 'Tom-Boy' type of girl.. I liked sports, fishing, hiking, cars, boy clothes.. I liked hanging with the guys.. I used to play Pogs, and video games, and used to run around in a sports bra and basketteball shorts, No one seemed to have a problem with it. Through the years I went back and forth through "phases" of which way to dress-like a girl, or like a boy. In the 7th grade I dressed like a dude, and got shit for it for the longest time, what it's not okay for a girl to be comfortable in guys clothes or what? So, I changed back into being a girly girl- That went on until about my Junior year in High School. I started dating girls seriously again, and wanted to be comfortable with myself- and in guys clothes I was comfortable with myself. I never really got as much attention dressing like a guy than as dressing like a girl, but I was comfortable so I didn't care. Now recently, my girlfriend left me- and she wanted me as a dude.. and I figured for a day I would dress like a girl to see how it goes.. Well I got compliments everywhere I went- [[Oh your so beautiful, you should stay that way- or you are born a girl, so be one- or girls like girls for that reason]].. Well, my parents, my friends, my co-workers all seem to be very pleased with the girly look- But, it's just not comfortable for me. I mean, yes indeed I do get A LOT more attention- making me feel a bit less self-concious. But, it just doesn't feel like myself. Im not mad at anyone for wanting or trying to change me, But you don't see me going out and about and going out of my way to change any one else- or tell anyone else things like what have been said to me. Usually, im not all about listening to people and doing what people tell me to- but if EVERYONE around me is telling me I should be girly, why not do it right? It's almost like peer pressure and doing drugs- only peer pressure on dressing like a girl. I know I should do what I feel is best and what I feel is really truley myself- but, no one likes me dressing DIKEY- Sorry, that Im not the image of how society thinks I should be.. or that dikes aren't the in "cool" thing..So, I guess for this time in my life- im out to make everyone else happy as usual and not myself. I like people being pleased with me, and happy for me.. I just don't know what else to do- It's what everyone else wants; So fuck it right?
[[So for any females who were born a female,
don't go getting a sex change, or wear boxers or a hat- or don't look at girls- WHY? Because that's not how society portrays you, or that's not how you were born]]
*Does that make any sense?
Absolutly NOT!
Do what you want- be your own person and be
free..
But as for me, IM just out to please everyone
else I suppose.
