OK, just curious. Why is it that when people see me smile they grin and ask me what I have done?

Teacher asked the class to spell a 12 letter word! Kid Says: Masturbation! Teacher Says: WOW! That's a mouth full!?! Kids says: No! you're thinking of Blow Job!

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving and a safe and wonderful Christmas and New Year :)

I'm back in school these days. Sorry i haven't been around :( Luvins to ya

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

Doctors say drinking 8 glasses of water a day keeps skin looking younger. But I say drink 8 glasses of wine a day and you won't give a damn how old you look.

Stop acting like God's gift to women... The gift was the Orgasm, You're just the messenger boy...

I'm not a smart ass, I'm a wise ass! A smart ass can sit on a ice cream cone and tell you what flavor it is, a wise ass can just tell you its going to be cold.

Thinks that people with piercings and tattoos are WAY more fun to see naked. ;) HA ;D

Liquor.... She'll love it!!

is going to join the dark side. Who else wants to join? We have handcuffs, stilettos, whips ... and cookies!

If I were a guy this would be my status.... Hey, can you box? Yeah you can, well drop to knees and give me a couple blows to the head.

omg its too big it wont fit...try harder...OK...omg that hurts so bad...OK its in...that wasn't so bad...i can believe my foot actually fit in a 6...lmfao

i should have just stayed off the internet today..

A rooster saw a cat fall in water & laughed. The cat said a wet pussy always makes a cock happy!

pulling out of a disabled parking zone, a police officer calls out "what's your disability?" As I drive off I call back " fucking torettes, piss off asshole"

Hope to be able to stay put for a min to "LIKE" people soon :( Sorry

What's the difference between LOVE, TRUE LOVE, & SHOWING OFF? Answer- SPITTING, SWALLOWING, & GARGLING.

Sooo sorry, Liver, but it's a 3-day weekend. It's unfortunate for you that I have it off, but you don't!!

Deny all...Admit nothing... Blame somebody else...