Whelp, what can I say about myself other than I am awesome and I have a huge cock. I like to beat it wildly with a stick.I am mildly retarded but that never stopped the ladies from hanging around. I mean literally. I find them wondering around the farm looking for gas or someshit so I blast them over the head with my sledge then gut 'em like a deer and hang them upside down to drain in my tool shed. I like to see what their insides are made of. Like a Super Stretch Armstrong. You know what I'm sayin'.Um, I like long walks on the beach, quiet candle lit dinners and killing drifters.I like...no..I LOVE poetry and romantic novels....ok that's a lie, I've never really been into reading...I actually don't read...uh.. ok... I cant read. I'm making Drayton type all this out for me. Drayton is my oldest brother who is smarter and more handsome than me. I will always do what he says because Drayton is cool.( dRatoN tiPed tHat me dId noT)I have sausage link fingers and I like to eat rubber bands.I love to dance in the moonlight whilst banging on my skin drum made from the flesh of a local hair dresser. I stubbed my big toe on a wash tub once. It was neato. If I was a tree I'd be wrapped in plastic baggies and singing show tunes.If you think I'm being anything but sacastic- you're an idiot and I want to marry you.------------------------------------------------------------My Jagermeister QueenI stare endlessly into your frozen eyesI gladly drink and it tastes like honey to meIf I only have this night, you will stay with me foreverI will drown in your freezing warmthYou were my Jagermeiser QueenI wish you could hear me but you are much too far awayI long for you to intoxicate me once againYour substance is the color of the void inside of me nowBut you never could be mine whole - you belong to the world outsideMy Jagermeister Queen------------------------------------------------------------Epitome Of My DisasterActing selfishly and without cautionI worry not, for tomorrow has been preordainedI am already dead to be.Venomous impulses enslave my facetsI can no longer control the uncontrollableIf all is for pleasure-Surely its antonym will catch up swiftly and remove me from all of thisIt will engulf me and swallow me wholeIt will ravage and destroy meIt will be a faceless beast with a score to settleI've no choice but to let it take me to places I have never seenI have masked, hidden, buried and obscured itBut its something that can never be destroyedIts an indelible part of myself now and forever will beThis insipid and vapid compulsion -It is the Alpha and Omega of all my ritualsTo squelch this meaningless progression would bring a certain peace to meA tangible emptiness is draining my will to existIt sucks the very life force from my veins The strength to atone my actions becomes fleeting I must maintain a firm grip after the collisionWhen the Maelstrom comes to overtake me I will fail and become the very thing I loathe Like a cancer in my soulIt eats away at a rapid paceUnforgiving and coldIt stretches out inside of meConsuming and digestinguntil all that is left is nil I can see yet I am no profitI can feel yet I am numb from the inside outI can hear but I no longer understandI forge forward yet I remain stagnant This is the epitome of my disaster