I've got 27 years of trickiness and creativity under my belt. And... according to a questionnaire which I took while sitting in a class I didn't belong in, I have a 75% social desirability. Maybe I should focus my educational aspirations on a psych major so I can sit around all day and answer true / false tests to find out how desirable I am?

What's there to say? Stuck between a rock and a hard place. Literally. I'm that back country hiker who didn't bother to heed the warning signs that read Park Closed: Hungry Wild Ass-Bears Seen Mauling Hikers. I went ahead and ignored the signs, ran into a beastly bear, fell into a Batman lair-like cave as I tried to outrun the bastard, and got myself wedged between hell and a giant boulder. So I have a little extra baggage I have to carry around. The emotional kind. Who doesn't have any of that? The question is where's the lost & found when you need it?

I want to meet someone to pick the bones out of my fish. I hate getting pricked by those damn things during dinner. I also want to meet someone who can tell the difference between Haribo and Black Forest gummi bears based on taste alone. They're not the same dammit!

I could write for days and days about myself and still never reach the truth of who I really am as a person

Would it not be more enjoyable to find out for yourself and draw your own conclusions as to the nature of my character? One thing I can tell you is that I could not continue living without art, music and my daughter.

I'm never content with whatever I'm working on. Aesthetically, anything I tweak is a direct reflection of my personality and tastes. Consider this profile - which I dub derkilicious - an ever changing work in progress.

"Practice safe lunch....use a condiment"