First, some words of wisdom:
The politician is an acrobat. He keeps his balance by saying the opposite of what he does.
Now for a dirty limerick:
There was a young fellow named Dave
Who kept a dead whore in a cave.
He said, "I admit
I'm a bit of a shit,
But think of the money I save!"
and last but not least a corny joke:
The doctor was examining a young model who was having tremendous pain in her side.
"My dear, you have acute appendicitis," the doctor said.
The woman became quite angry and said "Don't try hitting on me doctor, I just want to be examined, not complimented."
There you go